Paul Merrill
Friends fall into a spectrum. Some people we just love — and others — well, not so much.
Of course you know that. But sometimes there is guilt involved. If someone falls into the not so much end of the spectrum, we often feel guilty — that we should like them more.
Relax.
Just let people fall naturally where they fit into your spectrum. But give yourself freedom to realize that your feelings toward them may change over time. Or not.
You know that men are different from women. I know that too.
I’ve been married to Heather for more than 20 years. I love her and am always amazed that after all these years, we are still discovering new things about each other.
She started a new contract job recently at a large company that has a fairly formal corporate culture. She has to “dress up” to go to work. Some mornings involve a clothing crisis before the right outfit is found.
Now this is partly a personality thing, but it takes me about 5 seconds to choose what I’ll wear to an event or a work situation. Heather deliberates till she finds the perfect outfit. Since she has really good taste, she scores. (I don’t always score, but she often will warn me of impending mistakes.)
So I came up with an idea to save her time in the morning. What if I took photos of each of her outfit combinations and she could just flip through the set of photos to choose the outfit for a particular day?
No. She didn’t like that idea. Why? “You just wouldn’t understand.” (True.)
One thing I love about photography is that you can take photos and have them for a while.
We took a long trip this summer, and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed looking at the photos I took, over and over.
This family was in the Harrod’s Store in London. I will never know who they are. They will never know who I am. We will never meet. But I can wonder about what their lives might be like.
Yesterday and today on my Greener grass Media blog, I did an interview with Neenz. You really should go over there and read it. Even if you’re not into social media, I promise you will learn something!
I know that I said I wouldn’t mention any more about my posts over there, but I had to point you to this great interview.
You never know when the past will meet the present.
Two weekends weeks ago, we attended the graduation ceremony for our dear friend Stefani. Little did I know, but that day the pastor from my junior high and high school years was being given an honorary doctorate. He also gave the commencement address (excellent).
After the ceremony, Heather, Rachel and I went to greet both him and his wife. They were super nice! I told them how their influence on my life so many years ago was still lasting to this day.
Moral of the story? You may be making an impact on someone today — and that impact may last a long time.
(The horrible photo is from my cel phone — but that is the couple, on stage.)
Today I’m over at 300 Words a Day, writing about bridging the gap in lost relationships.
Actually, this was a rare moment in our relationship.
One of my sisters came across this photo while we were dissasembling her apartment. (I love the pic!)
Last week I went to my organization’s home office for a business meeting. After the meeting, friends of almost twenty years took me to the airport for my flight back to Denver. We haven’t seen each other much since we parted, nearly 18 years ago. But our bond is still deep enough that we were able to cut right to the heart of our current joys and struggles. No discussions of what sports our kids play or what schools they attend. By the end we had some real solid material on which to pray for each other.
Who do you know like that? I hope there are similar friends in your current circle. Takeaway: how can you deepen your present-day relationships? I’d suggest opening up to those people in a deeper way than you have before. Be risky.
I’ve always loved pens.
I just met Phil. He gave me a pen. (How cool is that?) He told me about the Levenger Store at Macy’s — a few blocks from the conference I attended over the weekend. Normally Levenger will assemble a small notebook for you to try out their pens on. Sadly, they were out of the paper, so I couldn’t get one. I did test drive a few of their pens. Nice. My budget wouldn’t quite stretch for the one I liked, but I did buy some pencils! My buddy Jon is analogue enough that he likes pencils, so I shared my pack with him.
One of the reasons I enjoy the social media community is that they’re very open-handed and friendly, as evidenced by Phil and Jon. Even though Chris has more than 66,000 followers on Twitter, he greeted me like a long-lost friend. (That was our first time to meet in person, though we have known each other through blogging for almost four years.) Jon, Becky, Sheila, NEENZ and I were good buddies by the end of the conference.
The social media community is a huge contrast to the graphic design community. When I finished college, I started work in Dallas. I went to several professional designers’ meetings. They seemed to be centered around achievement and ego. I never fit in. But the social media community celebrates those with disabilities that some may look down on. How refreshing!
And the pencils and pen are nice.
Takeaway: what are some ways you can be open-handed today?
