Category: Life

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Do it today

Blossoms by the side of the roadAbout a week ago, Denver experienced some of the most amazing flowering spring-ness that I’ve ever seen. But it quickly started disappearing. A major wind storm blew many of the blossoms to the ground. Then a quick hailstorm finished off more of the blooms.

I was able to get out and enjoy the spring beauty by taking a bicycle ride one day. I would have regretted missing that short window of opportunity.

If you have kids, they won’t be with you for more than maybe 18 years. If you’re married, your beloved may not be with you forever. If you have a dog, she may not be at your side ten years from now. I don’t say these things to be mournful – but rather to remind you – and me – to make time to spend time with the ones we love today.

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Time flies

Last Friday evening was a significant occasion for our family. Our oldest son Jay, a senior, was voted “Mr. Eagle” at a big high school event. He beat 11 other contestants. (His class has roughly 500 kids.)

It was thrilling to hear them announce the new Mr. Eagle, in a room of more than 700 screaming kids. Well, a few were adults, though I’m not sure how many of those were screaming. Heather and I screamed along with the rest.

Looking back, I remembered one of the events that shaped who Jay is today. We moved to Kenya, Africa in 2005, for a two year work assignment. Shortly after we arrived, Heather enrolled both Jay and Ben in Ligi Ndogo (“small league”) – a soccer club for boys. They were the only white kids in the whole league. They learned to relate to kids of another culture and to speak a little Swahili. They didn’t want to go every Saturday, but we basically forced them to take part. “Eat your spinach, it’s good for you!”

The Mr. Eagle evening included answering questions that the contestants were not prepared for. Jay’s question: “What one thing would you do differently, if you could live your life over?” He paused and said he wished he had been able to spend more time in Africa.

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We are so small

We are so smallIt’s always good to get perspective.

Last week, we went to Colorado’s Great Sand Dunes National Park. It’s a dramatic place – huge sand dunes are spread at the base of a larger chain of mountain peaks.

Thankfully, the weather was perfect. The wind was not blowing very much. The temperature was cool – our bare feet did not burn.

It’s always good to remember just how small we are in the scope of things.

(That’s Heather in the middle. Jay, Ben and Rachel are in the distance.)

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Save your kids the effort

Crap at My Parents' HouseI love Urban Outfitters. My sister introduced me to the store when she lived in Chicago. They have a collection of eclectic clothes and weird stuff that I occasionally spend money on.

So this book on their shelves caught my eye. My wife Heather spent the better part of six months dealing with this very issue at her parents’ house. They were pretty much too old to deal with getting rid of a house full of stuff before they moved into a much smaller home, so that joy fell to Heather. I helped some, but she did the vast majority of filling the shelves at the local charity shop.

My dad was a huge collector. After he died, it took my mom more than six years to clear out all the stuff that he collected, before she was able to move into a 1-bedroom apartment. (She didn’t want to buy a condo, as she felt like it would be a burden on her kids to have to sell the place!)

So I guess my only point is that if you don’t buy that junky thing that catches your eye, your kids won’t have to give it away later.

Footnotes:

1. Special thanks to my friend James Taylor (not the musician), who inspired this post.

2. Here are some related posts I wrote: Not going to buy it, Let it go, Recapturing that lost childhood and That collector gene.

3. I did not buy the book. And I was amused to see that as of this writing, it was selling for just $1.48, used. Apparently several people decided they didn’t want their kids to have to give it away, much later.

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Save your skin this winter

SoapI used to have dry skin all winter long. It’s dry in Colorado and combined with the cold, my skin becomes really dry.

Soap makes a huge difference. As soon as the temperature dips down to freezing outside, I switch to fancy soap.

This is not a commercial. I won’t tell you what kind of soap to use (like I did before), because several kinds will work fine. Just experiment. Spend a lot more than you do on your current standard soap.

Your skin will say thank you!

Sadly, my hands still get dry. Lotion fixes this, but then it takes several minutes for the greasiness to die down.

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The chaos story

Mexican blanketWhen I was young, an observant teacher identified me as a kid who should take a vocabulary test for students with bigger than average vocabularies.

To this day, hundreds of years later, I remember one wrong answer. The word was “chaos.” In my head, I read it as: “chay-ohss.” Not: “kay-oss.” One of the choices was “a Mexican blanket.” I picked that definition. Spanish was not part of my world yet, so “chay-ohss” sounded like a Mexican blanket.

Photo courtesy of Gwilmore on Flikr.

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Friends

The spectrum of friendsFriends fall into a spectrum. Some people we just love – and others – well, not so much.

Of course you know that. But sometimes there is guilt involved. If someone falls into the not so much end of the spectrum, we often feel guilty – that we should like them more.

Relax.

Just let people fall naturally where they fit into your spectrum. But give yourself freedom to realize that your feelings toward them may change over time. Or not.

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How pure are you?

cigaretteWhen you put money into a retirement fund, do you check if that fund supports the tobacco industry?

If you buy baby formula, do you check if that company markets their formula aggressively to new mothers in developing countries – at the expense of their children’s health?

It’s hard to be pure in this world. Most decisions end up being the best of the mix we can find. Or we may not examine all the factors that go into a decision.

I’m often too lazy to examine my decisions. And sometimes I know the potential downsides to a decision, but I make it anyway.

My friend Tim Gier, a vegan, makes most of his decisions with a very focused approach. I admire that.

What’s a decision you made that you later regretted?

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